chicken drop and first belize scuba dives

last things first.  i did 2 dives today from the reef off ambergris caye and they were wonderful.  there were 7 of us, our divemaster and crew, we boarded a 25ish foot boat and headed out.  there's a small break in the reef that all the boats use, the only place nearby that a boat can cross to the outside.  the reef system here is incredible, it goes as far as you can see.  the weather had calmed down considerably, sunny and only a perfect amount of breeze.

our first stop was the mermaid's lair, just outside the reef, we went down about 90 feet.  almost to the bottom the first thing i see is about a dozen sharks below me, nurse sharks, maybe 5 feet long.  they were beautiful, swimming peacefully, they'd come up pretty close to check us out.  we had all types of fish, turtles, many more sharks, and the corals and fans were great.  the visibility was about 40 feet (?) which i thought was really good considering the 2 days of storms that just passed.

the second dive was at tuffy's, again just outside the reef, and it was good as well.  the grouper were huge!  there wasn't the crazy color that i saw in cozumel, or nearly the amounts of fish, but all in all they were 2 good dives.  kinda makes me think that i should pop back up to cozumel for another week of diving, as long as i'm still this close.

the group i dove with was great, all very nice people.  funniest thing, there was only 1 person who was not originally from ohio.  one woman grew up in parma hts and was about my age, its weird to think that at some point in my 14 years in middleburg hts i probably encountered her and never knew it.

i had previously seen most of our group at a bar last nite.  not surprising since basically every tourist on the island goes to see the chicken drop, which is held only on thursday nites.

i walk to the bar at about 7pm last nite, its about a 10 minute walk from my condo.  i was told to pass the public square and you can't miss it.  so true.  i was walking along the beach and most bars had a few people here and there, then from a distance i hear a live band blaring and see dozens of people in one spot.  must be it.  theres a giant white square on the sand with mesh on all sides, and numbers 1-100 in smaller squares.  you go inside the bar, buy as many squares as you want for a dollar each. there are about 10 games all nite so plenty chances.  the idea is that they put a chicken in the square and it wanders around until it poops, then whatever number it poops on is the winner.  you get the $100.

i must admit that it was pretty entertaining, but not something that i ever need to do again.  it sounded a little more exciting than it actually was.  mostly the chicken just stood there and stared at the people.  the fun part was the announcer.  i've never heard so many cock or poop jokes at one time in my life.

when it was time to start he'd yell into his microphone 'chicken security!  bring me a chicken!'  and these young boys wearing chicken security shirts would come out with a chicken.  if the chicken was in the ring for too long without pooping, 'chicken security!  bring me a cock!'  and a bigger chicken would get added to the ring.  and the whole time they're playing this funky 'sexy chicken' song that the band wrote (and were selling cds of on the beach).

i only stayed a couple hours, although i wanted to stay out a good bit of the nite.  the local guys at the bar were making me crazy, they see a girl by herself and it was feeding frenzy.  hey girl wyncha come back to my place i got somethin for ya, hey girl where's ya husband, hey girl i'm the one ya came hea lookin fo, hey girl let's you n me go make our own party, on and on and on.  it was pathetically horrible.  one guy grabbed my arm and i told him to let go and pulled and pulled (all the while he's doing his version of sweet talking me) and i finally told him that he was gonna spend the nite digging his severed fingers out of his asshole if he didn't let go.  that worked.

so there's 3 types of guys that live on this island.  the first are the landsharks, as noted above, that are easily identifiable from a distance because they are kinda gross, don't necessarily have a full set of teeth, and begin shouting things that 'seem' sweet as you walk by.  they are doing their very best to find not only a woman, but one that will pay for all their drinks, buy them cigarettes, etc.  i told one that if he was really looking for a sugar momma he should consider the occasional shower.  with soap.  needless to say i didn't spend any money on any of these guys.

the second type of guy is the one that sees how horrible the first type is acting towards me and comes to tell me what jerks they are, no manners, no class, they're giving all of us a bad name.  but if you were my girl i'd treat you way better.  so same basic guy, just going for the soft sell, like he's the knight in shining armor protecting me from the first type.

the third type is the actual nice guy.  and they don't hang out at the tourist bars.

so i spent my time chatting up random tourist guys since the local guys don't wanna bother with them.  i met a guy with a cleveland firefighters shirt on, and the same white velcro sneakers as my dad. that was pretty funny.  for a second i thought my dad had come by for a visit.  i also attached myself to a giant bearded harley type guy from texas smoking a cigar.  i didn't tell them that i was using them as a cockblocker (yup more chicken jokes).

but every time i got up to get a beer i'd get waylaid by another local (baby why you got no man, you must be lookin fo one, i got somethin you like) so after my numbers didn't get pooped on i bolted.  i had to run the gauntlet of locals on the way home (honey you don gotta be alone tonite) and was pretty happy when i was back in my air conditioning.

i hate being rude to people but the guys here are more annoying than the shopkeepers in mexico.  i'd really like to talk to the local guys but its nearly impossible without eventually having to tell them to fuck off.  the guys at the dive shop are great, and if i'm dying to talk to someone that's not a tourist i go to the grocery store and chat up the women.

i was worried about tonite, its friday nite and i really wanted to hit the bars, but after last nite its just not worth the hassle.  i needn't worry, though, because i get to dive the blue hole (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Great_Blue_Hole) tomorrow!  and my boat is coming to pick me up at 5:30am.  which means dinner and beers at wet willys on the pier and home in bed by 10.

sexy chicken chicken, sexy chicken chicken